Society is changing, women are coming out and joining men shoulder to shoulder. In such a situation, it is not right to limit men to mere semen donation and resource mobilization, it is also necessary to make them feel paternity.
Actor Imran Khan also did something similar. When her daughter was about to be born, she also took a break from films for some time. According to Imran, such things happen once or twice in your life. In such a situation, this moment should not be wasted at any cost.
He said that as a father, he felt that he was always nervous about having a daughter, am I doing right? am i doing wrong? Did I feed the baby properly? Was he not hungry? Have I got him overeating? All such questions kept coming in his mind. He felt passionately that a husband should be with his wife at the time of having a child. Giving birth to a child is like getting a new life for a mother.
Riteish Deshmukh’s wife Genelia D’Souza says, “Riteish is a great father. He even used to change his son’s diaper. used to bathe her. Even getting up in the night used to carry the crying child in his hands.
It is also true that the responsibility of a mother towards her child should be as much as that of the father. Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg also took two months of paternity leave after the birth of his daughter and spent happy moments with his newborn baby girl.
But can a common Indian father think of doing so? Absolutely not, because the role of raising a child is played by the mother, the father provides comfort to the family and children. This thinking is prevalent in the whole country that only the women of the house can take care of the family and children. The job of men is to earn by going out and taking important decisions. But it is a lie that a father cannot take care of his newborn child in the same way as a mother.
When Indian cricketer Virat Kohli became a father for the first time, he decided to take a break from international cricket. This was also supported by the Board of Control for Cricket in India and for this it also gave him paternity leave. Similarly, New Zealand team cricketer Kane Williamson also decided to take a break from international cricket when he became a father for the first time.
A pregnant woman starts thinking about her even before she has a baby. After having a child, her worry increases that how she will handle everything. In such a situation, if the father also takes a holiday and stays with his wife, then the worry of the mother is reduced to a great extent.
Psychologists from the University of California Riverside conducted research on more than 18,000 people. According to research, fathers are not only able to take care of the child better than the mother, but they are also more active in taking care of the children. This research suggests that a father can also take care of a newborn child like a mother.
Israeli researcher Ruthfieldman found in his research that the way hormonal changes occur in the mother at the time of child care, the same has been seen in the father. When their mind accepts that the responsibility of taking care of the child is on them, then their attachment with the child starts like that of a mother.
There has always been research about such a relationship between a child and a father. According to research, the relationship between father and child is very special. It is the responsibility of both the parents to raise a child. This has a good effect on the development of the child. But the role of father in parenting is special. Science also confirms that the father who does all the work of the child like the mother, they later play a successful role in the social life.
In the olden days, when women were about to become mothers, they were sent to their maternal home. There was a custom, in this the father had no role. In earlier times, children were born at the hands of the midwife at home. Due to becoming a mother at a young age, many times women also died during childbirth. But today it is not so. Nevertheless, the responsibility of taking care of children is considered to be of women only.
Even today, there is a thinking in a large part of the society that what is the need of a father to be with the child? In our country, paternity leave is not traditionally accepted nor required. It is clear that there is no logical or scientific reason for not accepting this, except those social and traditional beliefs that do not allow men to accept this responsibility.
The figures of UNICEF, a United Nations organization working for children, also show the same. According to a report by UNICEF, two-thirds of fathers in the world are such who do not get a day off when they have a child. There are about 9 crore children below the age of one year whose father did not get paid leave i.e. leave from work without deducting salary.
These figures are from 92 countries. Where there is no provision of ‘paid leave’ for men when they have children. UNICEF has requested these countries to make policies in favor of the family.
UNICEF Executive Director Henrietta says that early childhood, positive and meaningful interaction with parents is important for a child’s brain development for a lifetime. Due to this they are able to remain more healthy and happy and their ability to learn also increases.
But the government does not consider paternity leave as necessary like maternity leave. If there is a provision of leave for women, then not giving paternity leave to men is in a way promoting gender discrimination.
Of course, taking care of the child is the job of the mother, but it is also wrong to keep the father away from this responsibility. Four years ago, when Maneka Gandhi was taking charge of the Ministry of Women and Child Development, she mocked paternity leave and said, It will be time for Indian men to celebrate the holiday.
If we really want gender equality then we have to change this thinking. So far, we have come to believe that raising children is the natural job of women and the job of men is to provide them with this facility.
Progressive countries like Iceland are changing that. There both the parents are equally given leave of 3 months. Apart from this, one of the two can also get an additional leave of 3 months. Which of the two parents will take this leave, they decide together. By getting equal leave to the parents, the child can be brought up properly.
In many places, the care of children, the elderly and all the household chores are put on the women. But even then, these works do not get the status and respect that the work done outside gets.
In a study conducted by the McKinsey Global Institute, it was found that women in India do 10 times more unpaid work than men. If men also get paternity leave, then it will not only give emotional support to a mother, but will also bring gentleness and humility in men. Men will not be just providing the means or facilities, but they will also become a responsible father and husband.
By the way, in many cases even women themselves do not want to take maternity leave. They feel that because of that they are considered less professional or less competitive or because of maternity leave they may think that work can be done without him. In many places, there is also the fear of losing the job. But if both husband and wife take equal holidays then this fear can be over.
There is a misconception that girls know how to raise children from birth. When girls become mothers and things fall on their heads, then they learn everything. But at the time of the birth of a child, the mother is also as illiterate and ignorant as the father.
By the way, slowly, awareness is increasing in the private sector regarding paternity leave. A few years back news came that a private school teacher in Delhi had won his legal battle for paternity leave. This teacher took 15 days off from school when her child was born. But after returning to work, it was found that his salary for 15 days was deducted.
Last year itself, food aggregator company Zomato took a new initiative in the matter of paternity leave. He had decided to give 26 days paid leave for those who became the father of the child. Interestingly, according to the company, this paternity leave would be applicable in the case of surrogacy, child adoption and even same-sex marriages.
Now the era is not the same as before, where there used to be a full family. After birth, the mother used to have grandmother, aunt, aunt used to take care of the newborn child, then the mother did not have that much problem. Today is the era of nuclear family, where there is only husband and wife and both are working. So now the time has come that like maternity leave, paternity leave should also be thought of.
The father should also get the same number of holidays as the mother, because apart from keeping the child in the womb for 9 months, childbirth and breastfeeding, there are innumerable such tasks. Till now most of the fathers have been fulfilling their responsibility only in semen donation and resource mobilization. Whereas in the changing global social environment, mothers are playing an important role in mobilizing resources along with fulfilling the responsibility of motherhood. In such a situation, it is also the responsibility of the father that he also decides his role in the upbringing of the children. It also becomes the duty of the society to help them in fulfilling this responsibility.
There are 109 countries around the world where men are given leave on pattern leave. Germany is ahead of all these. However, fathers do not get full salary when they are on leave. In a total of 14 months of leave, parents can together decide who wants to stay away from office for how long.
This is followed by Finland, Iceland, Norway, South Korea and Sweden. In contrast to this, neither women nor men get paid leave in America. Salary is not given to the parents on taking leave from the job.
In India, women used to get 12 weeks leave, which has been increased to 26 weeks after the Maternity Amendment Bill in 2017. Apart from this, women have also been given the option of working from home. But no such policy for men has been made in the country so far.